in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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