Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
