i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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