either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
