so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Randomize
