ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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