I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
