I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
