It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
