you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
