therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
