the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
tell your sister to shave her snatch
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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