oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Randomize
