i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god