He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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