i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
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people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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