Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(559): View more from California

Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs

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(323): View more from California

Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.

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(765): View more from Indiana

So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.

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(214): View more from Texas

Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(407): View more from Florida

I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.

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(224): View more from Illinois

so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.

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(703): View more from Virginia

She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.

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(440): View more from Ohio

he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.

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