Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
