We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
