Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
