I want to have your abortion
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
