as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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