idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
