hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
