Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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