Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
My breasts were aching with rage.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
