we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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