Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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