Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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