I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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