What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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