as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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