I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize