there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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