lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
