Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
