Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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