If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
