In the future we'll all be gay
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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