Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
