wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
