Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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