The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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