You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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