guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My legs feel like baby dolphins
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
