we're blogging at a bar
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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