I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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