I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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