You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
