i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize