the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
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I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
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she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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